In a short span of one year that I have been an employee of Schlumberger I have had many moments where I was all alone to myself. For those who have never had the opportunity to live alone, I can safely say that the experience is truly enriching, fulfilling and sometimes really haunting. Yes you read it right: Haunting.
I have had a very unusual experience of working in this MNC which is known to truly keep its employees busy. But for some reason or the other they were not so successful with me. I had months after months all to myself with no corporate work load. Consequently I have been able to cherish the beauty of not being with someone.
Living with someone else and entertaining is a bit like wearing a security blanket to a party. Sure you’re there shaking hands and getting over social nervousness, but it’s a bit more comfortable, too. Until you live alone, it’s hard to figure out how much you like it when you invite people to your home and the kinds of parties and activities you like having them over for. There’s just something about having people come into a space that’s solely your own that helps defines those entertaining boundaries, and helps you shape the kind of entertaining plans you make in the future.
My job requires me to travel to some countries where I have to stay all alone with very limited telephone coverage and no internet access. Until you have experienced how it feels to stay “off the grid”, you might not know the distinct emotion of feeling like you have to see another person right now lest you turn into a permanent hermit. What this sort of residential isolation can do is help narrow down: just what it is you like about spending time with other people the most. Is it deep, connected conversations? Is it having partners in adventure? These kinds of insights can help inform how you spend your time — and might even lead to more enriching relationships where you’re your best person.
There are other benefits too. If I want to read in the middle of the night I can easily do that and not worry that I’m waking someone from a sound sleep. That last cookie or the last scoop of ice cream is guaranteed to be there when I want to eat it. I’m not half-heatedly overeating it because I know Anshul aka my flat mate would have scarfed it down the minute I turn my back.
Growing up these days so many people are afraid to be alone. They think that being alone means there is something wrong with you or that you are dumb-ass and cannot even get a girlfriend/boyfriend. At least this is what I am accused of. That is just so not the case. Being alone is amazing! This took me a while to get used to but once you do, its bliss.
Go ahead and take a million shameless mirror selfies, no one will know! Eat as much cake as you want, no one is judging you! You want to dance around in your underwear, while singing Yo Yo Honey Singh and crying? DO IT! Sure, its nice to spend time with others and enjoy others company, but it is really nice to come home and distress el solo. It is so important to learn to enjoy your own company and feel confident and happy with being alone. I mean, think about it…if you don’t like spending time with yourself, why would other people? You are awesome, so spend some time with just you.